Sharing a room with your brother must be complicated. As my husband and I lay in bed this morning, dreaming of the day when we wouldn’t have to get up if we didn’t want to, we heard Hal call out on his way to the bathroom.

“Daddy! Daryl peed on my bed!”

This gave us pause. Before Daddy could respond…

“No I didn’t!!” was called out from their bedroom.

“Daryl,” my husband said, “why did you pee on Hal’s bed?”

“I didn’t!”

“Yes he did!”

“Daryl, why did you pee on Hal’s bed?”

“I didn’t! It was water.” Some faint giggling accompanied the protest.

“Why do you have water on Hal’s bed?”

“Because I have a cup of water.”

“Why do you have a cup of water on Hal’s bed?”

Some more giggling from their room.

Then Hal called from the bathroom, “It wasn’t water! I saw stuff coming out of his penis!”

“Daryl!” called my husband in feigned seriousness, “Why do you have a cup of water coming out of your penis?”

Daryl giggled some more but didn’t reply. Hal didn’t renew his complaint either. So either Hal is relatively OK with his brother peeing on his bed, or he didn’t really believe that’s what happened any more than the rest of us did.

Sleeping Alone

Daryl spent the night at a friend’s house last night. He’s done this before but it’s been awhile. Hal doesn’t like it. Not one bit. He’s very accustomed to having his brother in the room with him. He said he was scared when we put him to bed and we told him he’d be fine.

Sometime after my husband left to pick up Jane from her outing with a friend, I thought I heard Hal’s door open. I gazed down the hall but saw nothing. I turned back to the computer. Time passed. Then my chair moved ever so slightly. Hal was hiding behind my chair.

“I’m scared Mommy. I don’t like Bubba being gone.”

I had him lay on the guest bed nearby until I finished the night’s blog post. Then I carried him back to his room.

“You know,” I said, as I tucked him back in, “when Bubba was about your age…” I was about to tell him that his Bubba had slept in a room by himself, but then it dawned on me that five years ago, I was about to give birth to Hal. We had already moved Jane into Daryl’s room so we could turn her room into Hal’s nursery. But, wait! That means…

“You know what, Hal?”


“Did you know you slept in a room by yourself when you were a little baby?”


“Yep. You slept in a room by yourself until you were about 2 or 3 years old. Sissy’s room used to be yours.”

He got a big smile on his face. “I did?”

“Yep. So, see? You’ve done it before. You are just scared now because you aren’t used to it. But it’ll be ok. I wouldn’t put a baby in a room by himself if it wasn’t safe, would I? And I wouldn’t do it to you now. You’ll be fine. I promise. Just remember when you get scared that you’ve done it before, even if you don’t remember. Ok?”

He snuggled into his blanket like he was willing to give it a shot, but then, speaking very slowly as if working it out in his head, he said, “Well, Mommy, maybe when I was two I was really brave and now that I’m four, I’m not very brave at all.”

“Oh, sweetheart. You are just as brave now as you were then. You just didn’t know anything different then. I bet if we grew another bedroom on this house and moved you into your own room, you’d stop being scared in no time. You just aren’t used to it, that’s all.”

With that, I gave him a hug and left him to face the monstrous silence of an empty room. Alone.